Part 1: What No One Tells You When You Sign Up For An Eating Disorder

My whole life has consisted of working out. Whether that be through team sports, running, or lifting. My whole life has also consisted of eating good food, and lots of it. From health foods, to Chipotle, to my giant sweet tooth. I never worried, counted, or tracked any of it. The crazy thing is it all never crossed my mind. I was performing great on the soccer field, one of the fittest girls on the team, and I ate what I wanted when I wanted. My life was the definition of “Work Hard, Play Hard.”

The week consisted of school, athletics, and eating to fuel my performance. (With sides of ice cream, Reese’s, and of course late night Callies Little Hot Biscuits.) I was the happiest I had been in life. I had met a great guy, had all my best friends around at all times, and a soccer team consisting of hype girls. I had thick thighs, strong for my sport, a tummy of happiness, a full face, and of course the pros of boobs and a butt. So what changed?

To be completely honest, I am not sure what the tip of the iceberg was for me. Maybe the trigger was 80% of girls around me constantly trying new diets, talking about weight, or the fitness trends happening at the time. But my goal was never to be skinny. I wanted to be a powerhouse. I wanted to look strong and actually be strong. However, the pros and cons to my mindset is that when I start a plan I go all in, 110%. Which can be a great thing and also a big con. The long story short from the physical side of things was that in less than a year I had dropped 40 pounds, lost my period, and many other things that I will cover later on. But the physical symptoms were just the most apparent things to everyone. The mental side was a whole new ball game. I had lost what my friends and family know me for…fun, happy, crazy, Mere.

That is what changed the most. My mindset. I had gone from surrounding myself with friends and family, to slowly pushing others out and hiding my ‘secret’ from everyone. I wanted to still appear to have it all together and be the Mere that everyone knew and loved. So begins the time I, Meredith Tunney, took on an eating disorder. Little did I know by age 21 I was signing up for a full time job; everything else in life was about to take a back seat.

 
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Meredith Tunney

When there’s opportunities to become fitter, better at your sport, and eat well, why would you not take them? My name is Meredith Tunney and I am originally from Chicago but played Division 1 soccer at The College Of Charleston in South Carolina. Growing up life was work hard, play hard. I loved every minute of training, practices, games of course, and being with my teammates. I also loved to put in the work off the field. Something about you breaking your own beep test record, outrunning a girl for a 50/50 ball, or squatting for a PR, sends adrenaline through my body. Life went from all of this coming natural and not to mention eating anything I wanted when I wanted to, to a whole new ball game. A game I was unprepared for, because in reality this was a game that I would lose. I was the type of girl who had life balanced with athletics, school, and social life. But what I didn’t realize was that I cooped with stress in a way that would deteriorate my health. The thought process became healthy, to healthier, and fit, to fittest. Train and ignore your stressors. Then suddenly, I had hit rock bottom. But my favorite quote goes, “Life is 10% what happens to us, and 90% how we react to it”. Which leads to what I thought would be the most incredible senior season ever, to the time that I, Mere Tunney took on an eating disorder. Or as some may see it, the female athlete triad. A topic that few talk about, but exists with many female athletes.

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